Change is good sometimes

 

Listening to this cd. This one is great and worthy of a vinyl release. Had a very close friend tell me I lost my passion and how I felt, and what I need to defend and speak up for. Said I’m too nice. Here’s what I got. I love my friends. Especially when they check on me and my well being. I know we all have bad days. I was pretty passionate for awhile about starting a band. I asked some friends that had bands and I was older than them and pretty embarrassed to play guitar in front of anyone. My first attempt was in junior high. We had two practices in my parents garage. One guy went on to a long career managing some famous bands. I took guitar lessons and mostly learned basics from that time. I did not play much for a long time but I loved learning about music gear and loved rock and roll. 

The next attempt years later I met some friends at their house and they were good musicians. They sort of threw me in the deep end and hollered at me to just keep playing. I get what they were trying to teach me but this was too intense for me. 

Third try…made some friends with and had coffee a few times with those young guys I told you about.

This was different. These guys had a studio with a huge fender amp. I had got myself a really good Gibson and a fender telecaster. These guys were not only good but gentle with me and said just let them know what I wanted to play and everyone makes clams (bad notes) at first and just keep going. We recorded them too to good equipment. They knew how to record. I’m not sure if they made the recording sound better later or not. I got to use both of my good guitars as we did two songs. One I wrote about being large like Godzilla …how it feels to be my size. The other was a big star/teenage fan club attempt. Both were instrumentals. I was so heavy at the time and it was summer in a hot studio. I almost had a coronary. I kept going and we finished both songs. I was going to add vocals later but that was too much for me.

I was not confident about my playing but it was one of the best things I ever tried. Before I did all this I went back to taking lessons again too. It gave me much needed discipline and a routine. My friends were concerned about how bad my health was and said they wanted to help me. We went on some walks together around town. 

I was very passionate about this band thing but I was already an artist. I started drawing dozens of band logos for this band, my friends got busy and did not have time for it and suggested I find other people to play with. I’m grateful they gave me that opportunity. 

After all of this I realized I enjoyed playing guitar by myself alone or playing for my dog who loves the sound of Spanish acoustic guitar. It took about 20 years to realize art is what I do. I play guitar now and then. Most of my friends have moved on and don’t have time to get together. It’s part of life. Change can be good. You don’t always win. 

I’m still passionate about art and music and I have a better respect for both. I have to pat myself on the back for overcoming my fear and trying more than once and in the end feeling good that I made the effort. 

You can hear these songs on my website. That’s me on guitar as Godzilla. The song is called Monster X takes Tokyo. I love it. I’m proud of it. I love my friends for believing in me.

Painting is fun. Guitars are fun. I love to listen to music and make art. Simple as that. My wife has be very patient with me and all my dreaming and gives me encouragement to keep trying things. She listens to my wild rants and reads my journaling and lets me be myself. She is the biggest part of my life. We have been through many changes. The current path so far has been healing and my health is improving. Somedays I am amazed how much more my love grows for her and how much she does for me. I am fortunate and grateful to have her and my dog here with me each day as well as the friends I have and family. I’m kind of hurt by what my friend said to me today in a text, but we aren’t all the same and we might think we know people sometimes when we might not. 

 

I like to laugh. I’m kind of sensitive. I try to learn from things. Most people might think I’m a nice guy. I don’t like to swear, I don’t drink anymore. This is me. I yam what I yam. Hope you all have the kind of day you want from life today. I’m going to get a fresh cup of coffee and dig though my collection to see what I got still or what I might have forgot about. Happy trails, god bless you and enjoy! Adios for now, Scoocher

Looking for me? Here I am!

 

Well I was on my last social media account I had left today. (Is this blog social media? I’m not counting my blog or website) so I’m trying to delete a few photos and it took awhile. After a long time deleting the site kicks me off. When I went back everything I was getting rid of was back again. I thought it over. My good friends and family all send messages to my phone. I had a lot of followers but almost never any feedback from anyone. I hoped to get people to my website by posting ads there telling people I had new things going on my website. I’m not even sure if it helped any. I had almost 800 followers. Is that good? I don’t even know. I deleted the whole thing. Some people I will miss seeing posts from and much of my former local goings on I will no longer know about most likely. I’m having to let go of it. Real communication is being lost. I’m trying to find out how to keep myself healthy. I have family close by. My true friends still contact me often and check on me and I try every week to remember to contact my loved ones. I still hug my family. I’m trying not to live in fear. Like the serenity prayer. (You know how that goes right? It’s good to know. Search it on the interwebs.) I have been working on my praying. I wonder if I’m doing it right at times. It has worked for me. I’m managing my anxieties and depression and that helps get rid of fear. I think I’m losing weight just by the little bit I have been doing like drinking lots of water in the day. Trying to move around when I can. I’m not on a diet and I cancelled my double u double u account (you know that famous one that is now an app) most hospitals will steer you towards surgery or their program which is deigned to get your information (apps) or keep you returning and constantly paying them (through their classes). There is no easy way than just eating less, drinking water and exercise. To really do that you must be healthy mentally first. This does not get discussed in diet class meetings. I have a real hard time keeping weight off because I’m a stress eater. I often tell myself I am hungry when I’m really not. I often can’t tell the difference between hunger and being thirsty. It took me a long time to give up artificial sweeteners totally. Well…that’s just part of it. I’m getting older. I have had some health issues that seem to be improving and some I’m not sure. I’m getting a check up soon. I pray that I’m getting better. My family is here for me. My wife has helped me tremendously and gone above and beyond to help me get better. I’m so grateful to have her and my dog by my side. My dog helps me too. He greets me every morning and he tries to get me to play fetch with him and he does not like me on my phone too long. He knows when I’m sad and when he sees that he often gives me kisses or has me pet him. I’m playing my records now and then. CDS sometimes too. Even dvds once in awhile. I have a bunch of old media. Trying to enjoy what I already have. I never really played video games. I’m wanting to paint but I have been going through my art I kept after we moved and I have lived with most of it so long so I’m trying to put up the ones I love most or find out which ones I still don’t mind looking at every day. I’m ready to have a different relationship with painting. I did not become a well know painter (or well known artist either really…) that’s probably a good thing. I look at my past work and much of it makes me proud. How much I grew as I went along. There is a lot of my youth in it. I remember how at times I thought I was making important art. Like I was going to inspire people to paint and draw. I was like that a long time. Like my big break was almost here. Things happen in my life and now I have changed good or bad. Change happens. I had a good time developing my style and learning techniques and I’m still very inspired and eager to paint but in order for it to be fun for me it has to change because it’s real now. I know when I make bad art. I know what makes it bad. It’s not necessarily accuracy. It’s what’s felt when I look at it when it’s done. Sometimes I stare at my finished work for a long time. I have learned to let my art go. I’m not really keeping track of where I ends up anymore. I thought one day I would have a nice coffee table book of my art. Pretty sure that’s not happening. I had some really successful art shows. I sold a bunch of paintings over the years. Most of my life has been art jobs of some kind. I have been very lucky. Art success for me now will be if I am happy to make it. It took a lot to get me to where I am today. I’m making good choices. I’m beginning to find joy more often every day. I’m trying to find laughter and at times I do. I’m working on myself because it’s up to me how my future goes. I can change myself if I try everyday. The world is changing fast and I’m learning so much about it and so much is beyond control. If you read all this I’m grateful. If you would like to leave a comment feel free or email me if you like at popkustomshoppe@gmail.com. 

Happy trails to you. Until the next post, Adios! -Scoocher

Scoocher’s Creation Cave March 2022

 

Hope you are all doing well and spending time with the ones you love. I have been organizing the cave and getting it ready for display shelves. I kinda got the dvd section done and cds will be next…after that the records or vinyls as the kids are calling them. I purged a lot to charity. Not even sure what I kept really. Finding things from years ago. Finding old photos. I thought I might be more sentimental about my past but I really am glad where I’m at today. My collection is like a breadcrumb trail on a long path. Small things to remember but a reminder I can’t go back and the photos remind me it wasn’t always as fun as I remembered things. I’m glad to be able to sort through my clutter and get it under control. I’m still fine tuning it all. I got a painting done for my uncle that I had not been able to get to and I’m still dreaming often of what to create next. I found a small print shop in town and I’m going to look into maybe getting a comic book I did long ago printed. Maybe even offset printed. Always wanted to get an offset comic done.

I have an idea for a new comic and I have a few journal notes down for it. I may get serious on that book soon. Also maybe start a mural in the cave. All in good time. Stay tuned!

the latest 2022

 

SO HERE'S THE STORY WITH THE NEW "SCOOCHER ART.COM" THING. IT'S A COMBINATION OF MY FIRST AND LAST NAMES BUT ALSO A NEW START. YOU CAN STILL GET HERE FROM THE OLD POPKUSTOMSHOPPE.COM ETC... THINGS HAVE CHANGED FOR ME AND MY FAMILY AS THIS HAPPENS IN LIFE AT TIMES. MY WIFE AND HER SIDE OF THE FAMILY HAD TALKED ABOUT LEAVING THE PLACE WE ALL GREW UP AND LIVED OUR WHOLE LIVES IN, SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA. WE ALL TALKED ABOUT IT AND THE TIME FINALLY CAME TO MAKE IT HAPPEN. WE WENT THROUGH A LOT TO GET PACKED UP AND I WAS WORRIED ABOUT TRAVELING AS MY HEALTH WAS NOT GREAT AT THE TIME (IT'S IMPROVING NOW). I HAD TO LEAVE IT MOSTLY IN THE HANDS OF MY FAMILY AND MOST OF ALL TO MY WIFE. MY BROTHER IN LAW WAS A HUGE PART IN PLANNING OUR TRAVEL. OUR NEPHEW AND HIS WIFE WERE THE ONES THAT HAD TRAVELED ACROSS AMERICA TO FIND OUR NEW PLACE AND FOUND JOBS AND SETTLED HERE FIRST AND WE ALL FOLLOWED AS SOON AS WE COULD.

IT WAS A LOT OF CHANGE. I PURGED A LOT OF THINGS I HELD ONTO FOR YEARS. LOOKED AT MYSELF AND MY LIFE AND WHERE IT WAS. WHEN WE FINALLY GOT OUR THINGS OUT OF OUR OLD HOUSE I WAS SUPRISED AT HOW SMALL OUR PLACE WAS AND HOW MUCH I HAD FILLED IT WITH MY THINGS NOT LEAVING MUCH ROOM FOR MY WIFE. WE WERE ABLE TO FIND A MUCH BETTER HOME WITH MORE ROOM THAT WAS IN MUCH BETTER CONDITION THAN OUR OLD HOME. IT IS MUCH NEWER TOO. WE FEEL VERY BLESSED TO HAVE IT ALL WORK OUT,

I WAS VERY WORRIED ABOUT OUR DOG AND HOW HE WOULD DO ON THE ROAD TRAVELLING BUT IT WAS AMAZING HOW MUCH HE LOVED IT. MOSLTY HE LOVED TO SLEEP TO THE HUM OF THE CAR GOING DOWN THE ROAD. SEEING PEOPLE IN AMERICA WAS VERY DIFFERENT AND SEEING HOW DIFFERENT LIFE WAS OUTSIDE OF CALIFORNIA WAS VERY AMAZING AND SEEING HOW BEAUTIFL AMERICA IS ON THE ROAD. 

MY FAVORITE THING HERE IS THE FRESH AIR. MY HEALTH INSTANTLY BEGAN IMPROVOING IN BODY AND MIND. MY WIFE AND DOG STARTED GOING ON WALKS HERE RIGHT AWAY. LOTS OF THEM. THEY BOTH LOST WIEGHT AND HE HAS ENERGY LIKE HE DID AS A PUPPY. WE ARE ALL WORKING ON OUR HEALTH. WE LOVE IT HERE. WE ABSOULTLY MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE.

I HAVE BEEN UNPACKING AND FINDING LOTS OF THINGS I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT AND HAD BEEN LOST. I'M WORKING ON GETTING FITTER SO I CAN SORT THROUGH IT ALL EASIER... MY MOBILITY IS BAD. I'M KIND OF RE-CONNECTING WITH A LOT OF THINGS I LOVED BEFORE WITH NEW EYES. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH SO MUCH. MOST IMPORTANTLY I BECAME AWARE OF HOW LUCKY I WAS TO HAVE MY FAMILY SUPPORT AND LOVE AND THAT I WAS NOT BY MYSELF. I TEND TO ISOLATE MY SELF IN MY OWN WORLD A LOT. I'M TRYING NOW TO GET BACK INTO THE WORLD. I HAVE A WAYS TO GO YET BUT I'M MAKING LITTLE STEPS AND BREATHING IN THIS GOOD CLEAN AIR AND TRYING EVERYDAY TO KEEPING MOVING A LITTLE BIT MORE AND SAYING A LOT OF PRAYERS AND ASKING FOR HELP. TRYING TO EAT HEALTY.

I HAVE MANY ART IDEAS I AM WRITING DOWN THAT I WANT TO GET DONE. MOSTLY I AM WORKING ON MY SELF SO I CAN  GET TO IT. I'M SMELLING THE ROSES AT THE MOMENT. FINDING GRATITUDE FOR THE BLESSINGS I HAVE RECIEVED. THANKFUL FOR THE SACRIFICES OTHERS HAVE MADE FOR ME AND PRAYING NOT TO TAKE MY LIFE FOR GRANTED. EXCEPTING THAT IT'S OKAY TO EXCEPT OTHERS LOVE AND REALISE THAT I HAVE LOTS OF LOVE TO GIVE. I AM TRYING TO GET RIGHT SPIRITULLY SO I CAN GET RIGHT HEALTH WISE SO CAN CAN HELP THOSE THAT HAVE HELPED ME ALL THESE YEARS. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE LOST WIEGHT. I HAVE NOT WIEGHED IN AT ALL. JUST TELLING MYSELF TO CHOOSE WHAT IS BEST FOR ME. I FEEL BETTER THE MORE I MAKE THE EFFORT AND MAKE GOOD CHOICES. IF I DO MAKE A BAD CHOICE I FORGIVE MYSELF AND TRY TO REMEMBER IT FOR THE NEXT TIME.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO READ MORE ABOUT MY DAY TO DAY JOURNALING PLEASE CHECK OUT MY BLOG. THERE IS A LINK IN THE NAVIGTION HERE AND A BLOG AD BELOW THAT YOU CAN CLICK TO GET THERE. THE COMMENTS ON MY BLOG ARE ON IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO LEAVE A COMMENT OR YOU CAN ALWAYS EMAIL ME HERE: POPKUSTOMSHOPPE@GMAIL.COM. I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU AND WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE MORE OF ON MY WEBSITE.

ABOUT MY SITE... I AM STAYING AWAY FROM MOST SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS. I ONLY GO THERE NOW TO LET YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE. I WOULD RATHER SHARE THINGS HERE MORE CONSISTANTLY. NOW YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND ME. I WILL BE UPDATING MY PORTFOLIO PAGE HERE (MAYBE I SHOULD CALL IT MY ART PAGE?). I HAVE A LOT TO SHARE WITH YOU HERE BUT I AM STILL UNPACKING AND SORTING TO GET TO THE IMPORTANT AND MOST INSPIRING THINGS. MAYBE MORE YOU TUBE PAINT PROGRESS VIDEOS? I HAVE A LOT OF MY COLLECTION SORTED ALREADY TO SHARE AND SOME TO SELL ON MY SHOP PAGE SOON. (AD LINK TO SHOP PAGE IS ABOVE).GOING THROUGH THINGS TODAY AT THIS MOMENT GETTING READY, SO STAY TUNED! BE GOOD TO EACH OTHER. GET PREPARED. SHARE WHEN YOU CAN... ESPECAILLY LOVE. TAKE CARE AND HAPPY TRAILS TO YOU, SCOOCHER