Sounds of Laughter...

I have been working on my second book with Jack Grisham from TSOL. Many people have said things about him because of his opinions and his past life to me. Here's what I can say about Jack (my thoughts...) I have not read American Demon yet and I may not because the Jack I have come to know is responsible, dependable, supportive and loyal. Maybe his past was different. TSOL was a dangerous band. True. I struggled in high school and searched for signs of life. I found some relief when I stole money from my mom's purse to buy discounted punk records. One was "Dance with me" by TSOL. It told a story of secret agents facing death every day and have sex with a dead girl because the girls at school would not give you the time of day. One song called "Sound of Laughter" really struck a note with me. I got laughed at for being overweight at school. It made me feel alone. I did have friends, but many of them did not have weight issues. One or two of my friends understood and rallied to the message of punk rock which was that you can change you future no matter what people tell you. Learn to question what is told to you and it does not matter what you look like, but who you are inside. The words to this song:

I can hear the sounds of laughter

Could it be they're laughing at me
I can hear the roar of thunder
I'm mad, I'm deranged

I see clown in costumes voices that carry
Their message to my mind
I'm like a child so young and carefree
My eyes see what they want to see

Lights are flashing, the colors are blurring
There are patterns in my mind
Things are hidden to the world around me
But still they say I'm blind

They wrap me up in a web of lies
Meet the man who's locked inside
I'm too many people in too many places
I've a split personality

I can hear the sounds of laughter
Could it be they're laughing at me
I can hear the roar of thunder
I'm mad, I'm deranged

I see clown in costumes voices that carry
Their message to my mind
I'm like a child so young and carefree
My eyes see what they want to see

This was poetry to me. It seems natural to me that Jack is writing books now. There is controversy today about a lady on a game show who lost too much weight. It's a game show folks. Don't trust TV. Don't let anyone tell you what you need to look like. What if they ARE laughing at you? Can YOU laugh at yourself? Life is pretty funny. I have this new sagging skin I call "Emperor Skin" after the Emperor from star wars. (...are you laughing at me now or with me? are you laughing? was that not funny? are we not men?) Go for a walk in the fresh air while you still have lungs to breathe and legs to walk and we still have air to breathe. (This I say to myself) Pet you dog or cat. They will not judge you. Use your sonic reducer and your bullshit detector... for the love of Joe Strummer!.... and don't believe the hype! (this I say to myself!) Drink your coffee while we still have beans! Relax... but don't get to cozy. Stand up sit down, drop and give me 20 soldier... go team! Forgive yourself! You can do it.
Last night in my health class I admitted I had got comforable and was going back to my old eating habits. My instructor told me to take 5 minutes of "Me" time when I got home and use my elpitcal wheel. I set it up in front of the TV and did it while I sat on the couch when I got home and did 11 minutes because once I got going it was easier than I thought. I did 8 more minutes this morning and now I am going to take the sweaters and jackets off my bike that I have been using as a coat rack I ride it down the block for a minute or two. Caio for now!